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Then It All Makes Sense
by Budjette Tan

Jeremy couldn’t stand it anymore. He just had to run to the bathroom to take a crap. He hated taking a crap in school because everyone would usually make fun of you afterwards. Yes, taking a crap was just considering down-right hilarious when you’re in grade four elementary school. You’d be called “Mr. Cappy Pants” for a week, or until the next unfortunate student had to answer the call of nature during class.

So, he doesn’t know if his current situation is better or worse. He was all alone in the bathroom and it was almost three in the morning. The florescent light in this particular bathroom wasn’t even working properly. It had been flickering on and off ever since he sat down on the toilet. On the other hand, it was a good thing that all of his fellow boy scouts were asleep in their sleeping bags out in the football field. At least only the Scout Master knew he was taking a dump.

His stomach grumbled and unleashed another batch of foul liquid into the toilet bowl. He felt like he was crapping out extra-thick chocolate milkshake. As pain grabbed hold of his stomach again, he wondered if the cause of it all was because he ate too many roasted hotdogs and marshmallows. Or was it because he drank beer, which was smuggled in by one of the guys in his knapsack? He muttered under his breath a promise never to mix beer with marshmallows and hotdogs ever again.

Jeremy slammed his hand down on the toilet lever and just as the water flushed his brown gunk away, another glass-full of his ruined bowels come out of him.

He knit his brow and tried to concentrate on pushing all that pain out of his stomach. But the flickering light was ruining his concentration.

He held the sides of his stomach and pushed down.

Push!

Flicker. Flicker. Flicker.

He closed his eyes and pushed again.

Flick. Flick. Flick.

The more he tried to not listen to the flickering florescent, the more he noticed it. And the more he noticed it, the more it reminded him of something.

Flicker. Flicker. Flicker.

It reminded him of something he heard early in the day.

Something about … flickering?

Flick. Flick. Flick.

No. Not that.

Flicker. Flicker. Flicker.

Something about… sounds some much like…

Dot dot dot

The test.

Dash dash dash

During Boy Scout Night, scouts were asked to accomplish several tasks in the dark.

Dot dot dot

One of them was to send and receive a message in Morse Code while blind folded.

S.O.S.

Flicker. Flicker. Flicker.

I’M

UP

HERE.

Jeremy slowly looked up at the flickering florescent light.

His scream woke up all the other scouts on the football field.

The Scout Master was first to find him.

Jeremy hugged him and didn’t really care that didn’t have any pants on and that he still has crap and tissue up his behind.

The scouts laughed when they saw Jeremy Crappy Pants crying like a baby.

But their laughter died down when they all looked up at the flickering light. The wood of white ceiling near the light had warped into what looked like the face of a screaming child.
All the scouts ran out and told the Scout Master they wanted to go home too.

Jeremy’s parents transferred him to another school, after giving him a six month vacation in the States. More than being called Crappy Pants for the rest of his life, Jeremy never wanted to set foot in that bathroom again.

So, did Jeremy just imagine that the flickering florescent was sending him a message? Was the face on the ceiling nothing more than just a trick of the light?

Whatever the answers maybe, Jeremy was one child who was more than happy to sleep with all the lights off.

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